I feel counterproductive

because I just drank water and peed at the same time. 

landslide.

you feel the earth shifting 

and all you can do 

is dig into the dirt

and grab onto the roots 

of a ten year old apple tree

hoping those ten rings

are enough to keep you grounded. 

it really bothers me when

my mom claims to know all of the words to a song, but once she starts singing it, not one of them are right. 

i would be okay with it if she admitted she didn't know the words and was just fumbling along because she wanted to. 

i wish i wasnt such an irritable fool. the end. 

:]

i like that my dad thinks about me when he sees butterflies. 

poetryvomit.

My Captain stands at the helm,

silver rings on her nimble digits

they shoot from her lips

from her pipe

in misty perfection

only to drift over the water

and hypnotize fish.

 

first stanza of a rather large poem i've been working on. i just felt like posting it because i remember when i used to write poetry on LiveJournal, and i realized that this blog is lacking in that department. 

i have accepted

that this is just something you can't turn off. 

revelation

how did you spiral into the complete opposite of who you once were? 

i feel like i should be supportive of your spiritual endeavors, but i get so incredibly creeped out by what you say....it makes being supportive as hard as pulling out my own teeth. 

i love who you were, and you were an incredible friend, but there's no going back from this. 

i wish you the best, and hope that you find a happy medium that allows you to live a steady and fulfilling life. 

come get your board out of my garage.....

it's become a memorial of your former self. 

chase is no longer a Xena virgin

and he is now my new best friend. 

he loves Xena as much as I do, especially when she beats up bad guys with a string of fish. 

the idea of me and my brother bonding over this, actually made me grin for quite a while. 

oh, this shall be excellent. 

i think it's super cute

when my dad calls my mom Adventure Girl. 

there's an adorable story behind it, but i really don't have the time and patience to write it down. 

i hope my marriage works out like there's......

it's really something special.  

literary adventure, climax?

when a story spends 1,375 pages building up the strongest relationship in the history of all relationships, the last thing you expect is for an abrupt destruction of the very bond that the entire story focuses on, as well as the death to every warm fuzzy, tickle fight, and silent understanding.

this fission or destruction leads to tears, empty sobs, and mild agony experienced by the reader. no bueno. imma have to tough this one out for another 1,000 pages or so. fuckaduck. i am incapable of stopping now. i apologize ahead of time for future bad moods. 

just went through all my old posts

and I was less embarrassed by my un-amusing rants than i thought i would be. 

i usually hate looking back at what i've written, and even this time there were some posts that made me cringe, but overall, i felt comfortable with what i've posted over the past few months. 

PLAN:

I am officially replacing the word God with Lady. 

example:

"Oh My Lady!"

"Lady is the only one who can save you now."

"Lady knows all."

the end. 

$da moniez$

i need to think of ways to make quick cash other than prostitution and drug dealing. 

babysitting is good, but it's inconsistent. 

a lemonade stand is a bit too juvenile. 

my gated community doesn't allow garage sales. 

my poetry is not worth money. 

and i can't commit to an actual job because summer school is starting and then i'm going to Italy. 

any ideas?

...

the absurdity of this situation continues to astound me. 

i havent blogged lately because

i'm pretty sure every thought running through my head lately

will only create shameful embarrassment for myself

if expressed to the public. 

anyway, on an unshameful note:

--mandala was pretty successful (in my opinion, at least)

--i'm feeling more like myself lately, and less like an awkward bundle of random emotions

--been hanging out with Ashley, and enjoying her crazy presence 

--talked to hoovy for multiple hours, soaking her in for the last time until Fall

--played sushi night with Steph, and ate her delicious scones

--realized how much I miss both Ali and the Talbots. (must go river exploring again)

the end. 

i'm seeing hoovy on wednesday

to read what her 8th graders wrote about Muffin-Cakes. 

this should be interesting. :]

okay, i just had to post this because it made me lawn.

misfortune: 

"the next time you sneeze, a permanent menstrual cycle will be triggered within you." 

i don't know why i think it's so funny...i just do. 

i just want to create something beautiful

i have ideas floating around my brain, churning and bubbling and eventually evaporating, 

i just can't shackle them to paper. 

this is frustrating. 

GRAWR. 

there is nothing more cathartic

than telling stories about you. 

sometimes i question my sanity. 

I will become a sigh of relief

when this school year is over.